Wednesday, 30 March 2011

Being me...

Right now being me is a bit like being a sporadic, crazy, cartwheeling moron! one minute its all chocolate box cottages with roses round the door, the next I'm clearing up after someone Else's bullshit!
They say 'everything happens for a reason'. this i have lived by my entire life, through my own choosing, and everything, however shit things have been, have always worked out in the end. No nothing worth doing has ever been easy, no I've never been handed anything to me on a shiny silver platter and no I've never had a free ride. Ive scrimped, saved, worked my fingers to the bone, done without, made sacrifices and made tough decisions to be where i am now, no its not perfect, i don't have what i want but underneath it all i am happy and i am very content in my boring, mundane life style working within my daughters routines and spreading myself thin to keep everyone happy. Would i swap it for fame and success? No probably not. All i ask is a little respect, maybe a touch of admiration and a tiny amount of gratification for digging deep and helping ppl that, well lets be honest, will never help me out in return. No i don't do it for these things, i do it cos it makes me smile, i do it cos i feel karma is alive and kicking and id rather be on the good end, and i do it cos id like ppl to do the same for me, not in return but i believe you should treat ppl in the way you want to be treated. Have i been shit on from a great height regardless of these things?? hahaha well yes of course, who hasn't been shit on! whether you deserve it or not we have all had miss happenings with people we would rather not happen. Do i hold grudges.. no i don't think i do really. Sure, theres some people i cant forgive and forget, some things cant be undone no matter what you do or say but like i said, KARMA! they will get theirs in the end, whether they deserve it or not, what goes around comes around!! manners don't cost a penny, or a thought or even time yet ppl don't use them? Why?? has society bred a generation of inconsiderate, manner less brats that expect a free lunch? Or am i to old skool to accept that things aren't like they where once upon a time when kids believed in fairy's at the bottom of the garden and the lady next door always brings an apple pie on a Saturday tea time? Maybe if we concentrated more on what we do have and not what we don't have then ppl wouldn't be as angry and self absorbed.. maybe if ppl did more for others for no return the world would be a nicer place... maybe i was just born 60 years to late.. maybe I'm just dissillusional about life and i need a slap!!! maybe, like the hubby says, I'm to soft and i should harden up!! maybe i should just go hide under my duvet and cry and accept that throughout my life ppl will take advantage, at least i know, regardless of what shit happens i have someone i can turn to, rely on and moan to....my gorgeous, lovely hubby! Now can you say that? mr and mrs i dont give a shit who i hurt to get my own way!..  Now to you all out there that have used and abused me.... in the words of you me at six.. You've made your bed so sleep in it.....


L xx